New Year's

Went into Mannheim today to see the celebration. I don't know if I can accurately describe it. Photos hardly do justice to the event. Video comes close.

Imagine several thousand people. Many of the laden down with explosives. Setting them off all around you. Fireworks blasting up into the sky, popping on the ground. Some of them failing to launch and blowing up within feet of bystanders, children included. People launching them at, or at least towards each other. Towards cars, buildings, trees, anything conveniently in the way of the blast. Sparks everywhere. Smoke thick enough to be a decent civil war reenactment scene.

The noise, the lights, the smell of gunpowder thick in the air. It was really something incredible. And then, midnight hit. People seriously started in then. Hundreds of fireworks being launched, and they kept on launching them. It really started about 30 minutes before midnight, and carried on long afterwards.

The effect was invigorating and mind boggling. I have never seen such a display before. I have watched fireworks from the safe, controlled distance of the edge of a park or across a river. Somewhere where everything is well controlled, and the city does a good job of making a good display. But here, unbound by the conventions of safety and propriety, citizens, launching explosive projectiles off in uncontrolled bursts. No oversight, no city budget constraints. Debris falling around you, smoke in the air. Noise like a battlefield. Every corner of the city lit up.

I think it's something that needs to be experienced.

More Big, Fun, Scary

A couple more thoughts on the Big, Fun, Scary.

I've set myself 12 goals. All of them big, fun, and some of them scary. Without getting into too many specifics, I'm hoping to create more, enjoy more, and generally do more this year.

I think it's not an impossible set of goals.

Big, Fun, Scary

I have been trying to avoid posting stuff online as a plan. I've found in the past that simply posting the plan makes me feel good, and that leads to me putting in less effort on the actual action. Or no effort in some cases.

But, I do have to make some mention of Big, Fun, Scary. It is an annual thing that the Office of Letters and Light put up on their forums. These are the same people who do the National Novel Writing Month, so they good things.

The goal of Big, Fun, Scary is to choose some new things for yourself. Set some goals, and then make an effort to achieve them through the year. Every year that I have participated, I have taken on the idea of one new thing per month. Thus, 12 new things.

This year, I am changing things up a little bit, by taking on some longer term items. Things which take more than a single month to achieve. I am still going to strive for 12 things, just things with longer reach.

I will blog about them as they come up. Everything starts on 1 Jan. So, expect to see more then.

Movie blahs

Ok... Last night I watched that animated owl movie. The Guardians of Gahoole or something. I have a couple of issues with it, which sort of broke the movie for me.

The movie is all about owls. Specifically, talking owls. Now, I can suspend disbelief for that. Talking animals are a pretty standard storytelling device. No issues there. Owls with complicated backstory and a vivid oral history? Sure. That's fine too. Comes with the whole being able to talk.

But, drawn history? Maybe, yeah. Some kind of scratching or whatever, sure. Written history? That's pushing it a bit. I mean, how exactly are they scribing these things? Some codified form of squawks and such? I guess I can let that slide. Of course, the real question is this: Where are they getting ink?

I've got no issue with the owls in the movie flying around. No issue with them maybe doing a bit of ornamentation to themselves. Dyes, markings, maybe some found stuff, whatever. Even basic handcrafts, I can allow. I mean, they've got feet and beaks, they could maybe work out some form of weaving or something. Sure.

Where I start to get into hassles is when the movie starts showing a whole lot of the birds using fire. Birds and fire do not go well together. Yet the movie is loaded with scenes of the birds around large flaming torches and candles. Which of the birds are making the candles? What bird is sitting around making the wicks? And then heating up wax and making the candles? On top of that, who is maintaining the torches? What is keeping them burning? Wood? Oil? I don't know, but the movie certainly implies it is the latter.

Then it takes a step beyond that, to a lot of birds wearing metal facemasks. Fitted, shaped and very clearly some kind of worked iron or steel. Forging? No. That's a bit too far. For one, the birds would need to get very close, or have tools to do the work for them more easily. But even then, they'd need to be working with a serious form of mechanical leverage to get forging happening properly. Especially for the detailed, delicate and intricate work shown in the film. Filligree? Gold plating? Seriously well out of my area where reasonable suspension of disbelief comes in. At this point, we're dealing with magical properties, but the opening of the story implies it to be somewhat realistic.

Beyond the facemasks, comes the claw weapons. These are hunter birds. Razor sharp claws. Do they fight with them? Not if they can help it. I'll get back to the bird fighting thing in a moment. Apparently, any warrior bird of any worth is outfitted with metal claws. Not sure what kind, but the metal was rather yellow from what I could see. So, maybe bronze or brass. Maybe just some kind of decorative steel? I don't know. We're back to the whole forging thing here. Beyond that, we're also dealing with leather glove things to attach these claws.

Leather? Where the hell are they getting that from? Sure, if you can assume the birds have figured out forging, tanning isn't a big jump anymore. But honestly, where are the birds getting this leather from? Which large animals are they taking down, skinning and then tanning the hides to make the leather? It appears to be regular leather, so I'm assuming a cow or horse or something like that. I suppose, though, that if a lot of armed owls wanted to take down a cow, they'd probably have a pretty good success rate.

Getting back to the battles. They are pretty much ridiculous. A bunch of birds flapping towards one another, then baring claws. That bit is actually pretty realistic. Of course, when they are also wearing metal masks, steel claws and pulling off martial arts moves on one another, it just seems a bit silly. A lot of the fights involve one bird smacking another into the ground, and the downed bird just laying there for a moment or two. I suppose that's at least somewhat accurate.

One other bit that bothered me. In addition to all the metalworking and leatherworking, there also appeared to be a defunct kind of fabric making happening. At least, the bad guy side had a lot of big banners strewn around the inside of their cave thing. Either the banners came from some kind of human settlement that was abandoned, or the owls made it. I'm happier thinking the former, since there's not much other fabric stuff shown in the film.

Getting beyond the difficulties I had with the whole forging, fire use and whatnot, I also have an issue with the structure of the bad guy lair thing. If you have a force of slaves, you also have to deal with the serious issues of feeding and housing. Sure, you could simply work them to death, but that seems like a dangerous proposition. After all, eventually someone should notice all the stolen young birds, right?

Anyhow, the movie is pleasant enough to look at, though the story is rather rushed, and there really is rather little behind any of the main characters to make me really care for any of them. I'm not all that concerned about whether or not the characters live or die, and I'm not all that concerned about the secondary antagonist. He seems to be a little too poorly defined, and his motivations are weak at best.

Maybe it is a better book than it is a movie? I doubt I'll take the time to find out.

Stuff about Germany: Greetings

Germany seems to be very big on the idea of greeting people. Generally, whenever you enter a room that other people are in (and you do not live with them), you say some kind of greeting. Different regions have different traditional greetings, but most places will be fine with a "Hallo" or "Tag."

When greeting people individually, it's a good idea to greet them with the time of the day. "Guten Morgan" for morning (somewhere from 4AM until just about noon), "Guten Tage" for the daytime (noon until around about 6PM or dark, whichever comes first), and "Guten Abend" for evening (after around 6PM until somewhere after midnight). I have no idea what the greeting in the wee hours is.

Of course, you don't have to be really formal about it. A solid grunt will get you by most of the time. Or any other general acknowledgement of the other person's existence. And, if you want to greet a person, but not be quite so stiff, just shorten the "Guten" part to "'n." Thus, "'n Abend." Nobody seems to mind it.

And, just in case you find yourself in one of those places that greets strangely, a solid "Gruss Gott" will get you by most of the time.

Fat guy!

That's me. The fat guy.

A bit of history, 'cause I can. Around 10 years back, I was out of school, and started to gain some weight. Just a bit, then a whole bunch. Maxed out at around 240 to 250 pounds. Didn't like it, so I dieted and tried to do more workout stuff.

Over time, with many trials and errors, I have managed to hit a low of 175 pounds. That was several years ago. Since then, the weight has bounced between 180 and 200 pounds.

Weight and I have been enemies for a long time. Nearly 10 years of trying to keep myself where I am comfortable, but also not starving.

I am currently just about 216 pounds, and have very recently been as high as 220. I don't like it. I want to change it. But, I need to find a way that is both constructive, and also cheap.

I do know of bodyweight things I can do. All I need, is just to start doing them. Squats, push ups, jumping, walking, running, and whatever else I can do to be physically active.

With that, I need to start really watching what and how much I put in my mouth. That's crucial, and also very difficult for me. Still, if I am to make any progress, I need to get started.

So, this is , more or less, a message to myself. Time to get started. Time to stop dallying about and actually get on with it.

Stuff about Germany: Boobs

Just a small note here. Compared to Canada and the USA, Germany is fairly relaxed about nudity.

Certain amounts of nudity are tolerated in the USA, such as bikinis and underwear adverts, but once you get to less clothing than that, the Americans start to have issues.

Canada is a bit more comfortable, in that certain provinces have allowed toplessness for men and women in public. Rarely done, since society as a whole still has some issues.

Germany is a bit different. While I don't think toplessness is allowed in public, there's much less of an argument against it in advertising, whether in print media or on television. Even still, there is apparently some consideration of whether children will be exposed to it.

So, if you're in Germany, don't freak out too much if you happen to see an advert with some boobs on it. It's normal.

Stuff about Germany: Streets

The streets in Germany are different than those I'm used to in Canada.

What I'm used to is a street that is paved with asphalt that is usually wide enough to fit two cars across, with probably some extra space on each side to let larger vehicles go by each other. Sometimes there is even more room to allow for parking. At the edge of that is usually a paved sidewalk. The sidewalk can be right up against the street, but usually it is separated by a bit of grass. Also, the sidewalk is usually raised up from the street by a curb.

From what I've seen of Germany, streets are like that at all.

First, the streets are paved with a variety of materials. Dirt, rocks, bricks, cobblestone, stone tile, asphalt, bottlecaps, chocolate and occasionally the backs of the working poor (only some of the previous are true). The most common paving material I've seen is brick.

Main roads tend to be about two vehicles wide. With no real space on the edges. Cars are smaller here, so I suppose that works out. Some roads are slightly more than one car wide, which doesn't make them one way, it just makes them harder to drive along. Generally, cars park on the sidewalk, either fully, or partially - though I have seen them park at the edge of the street on occasion, but those streets are usually wider than average (which still puts them about a car's width skinnier than a Canadian street).

Skinny roads with traffic going both ways leads to a lot of instances where cars wait for each other to pass between the two lanes of parked cars already on the street. So far, the German drivers seem to be very patient for this. They are not very patient when it comes to taking a corner though, so if you do drive here, try to make very quick left turns.

Sidewalks start at the edge of the road, and generally continue right up to the garden wall, or right up the house itself. The sidewalk is meant for people, execept for when it's used for parking by cars. Or when it is used as a bike lane. Or when it is used as both a bike lane and for parking.

Bike lanes are marked in red. This can be red brick, red paint, an area outlined by red, or simply space on one side of a lane marker (which is often white). Bike lanes may be on the road, on an area all to themselves, or as part of the sidewalk. And any bike lane may hop on and off the road at various points, depending on the level of car traffic and the whims of the traffic planners at city hall.

Pedestrians are supposed to stay off the red areas, and some places are pretty mean about making sure this happens. Generally, bikers and pedestrians get along pretty well. And cars are generally pretty courteous about bikes sharing the road. As long as you stay off the main highway areas, it seems like a good way to get around.

Stuff about Germany: Money

One of the biggest differences I've noticed in Germany is the money. Because of the adoption of the Euro, German money is the same money used in a bunch of other countries. I haven't been to these other countries (aside from Iceland, and that hardly counts - any place you're in for less than an hour does not count as a real visit).

The Euro comes in a bunch of denominations. In Canada, most people will see the $100, $50, $20, $10 and $5 bills. Canada used to have $2 and $1 bills, but these were changed out for coins years ago. In Euros, you have the same bill denominations as in Canada. No bills lower than 5 euros. Simple. Main difference is the smaller the bill, the smaller the size of the bill. The 10 euro is pretty tiny - about the size of Monopoly money. The 5 euro is smaller than that, maybe the size of pretend Monopoly money - you know, the stuff you get at the dollar stores.

The 20 Euro is close to the size of a regular Canadian bill. Thus, the 50 and 100 euro are larger. It feels a bit strange, but you can get used to it pretty quick. For me, it means having to work out a new system for my pocket money, since I used to sort it somewhat in the way a blind person might. By folding bills in different ways, or failing that, by simply remembering what I had in my pocket and where.

Coins are another things. Canada has a pretty standard set of coins. $2, $1, $0.25, $0.10, $0.05, and $0.01. Six coins in all. There is the occasional half-dollar coin that you can find, but these are more collectors items, and there's no machine that will take them. Cashiers look at you like you are crazy if you try to use them to buy things too.

Coins in Canada vary in size with the $2 being the biggest and the $0.01 the smallest. They go down in size as the value goes down, with the exception being the $0.10. The $0.10 is the smallest coin. I don't know why.

Euro coins come in 2, 1, 0.50, 0.20, 0.10, 0.05, 0.02 and 0.01. That's eight different coins. Most machines will take them all, but some machines reject the 0.20 coin or others - for no real reason that I can see. They also go down in size from the 2 euro, with the 0.50 being bigger than the 1 euro - again, no idea why.

Blogging...

Right... while the blog is supposed to be about my goals for fitness and whatever else I'm doing, I feel that I may have to sidetrack things to come around to blogging a bit about Germany. Now that I'm here, I'm afraid is really is a pretty significant diversion. So, expect a bit of rambling on it.

As far as fitness goes, I've really backslid on that. I pretty much dropped the whole 100 days thing, and stopped eating at all well. Went back on cola, and stopped doing anything that could constitute fitness in the least.

I am considering a gym here, which shouldn't be too expensive on a per month basis. But I won't even think about that until the month starts. Until then, I'm trying to eat better, cook better, and also get myself sorted out a bit.

Walking and hopefully getting back on the bike soon.

I'm apparently about 15km from Mannheim - so I could probably ride that distance without too much trouble - assuming there's a good route between here and there.

Stuff....

So, on Metric's album "Live it out" there is a song called Handshakes, which includes the line "Buy this car to drive to work\Drive to work to pay for this car."

This refrain has seized my brain recently. My gut reaction is to the apparent statement of the futility of work and consumerist culture. The purpose of the car is to facilitate working, but in the end, it becomes the reason for work itself. The paradox appeals to me on a base level.

I've often felt that things in my own life were that way. That I work simply to pay the debts I have, some of which I only have because they have enabled me to work. Like the car, or school, or whatever.

I see it in others too. Struggling against whatever debts or reasons or society, simply so they can be continue to struggle the very next day against the same things. And it makes me wonder what the point of it all is. I mean, if you're going to work so hard just to stay in place, maybe you should be wondering if staying in place is such a good thing?

Get off the treadmill people. Life has more than one path to it. Just step to the side and move along. Sure, society is going to look at you like you're crazy, but at the same time, they're going to envy you a little bit, because you're free now. You're off the treadmill, while they're still stuck running in place.

I don't know where I'm going with this....

100 days of fail

Totally bailed on the 100 days. No gym, bad food, bad feelings. Generally sucking at life.

For now, I'm going to abandon this, and try to not eat everything I see. Doubtful that'll work.

Day 13 + 14

Day 13 was a rest day.

Day 14

15 minutes on stat bike, fat burn program

Squat - 5x65, 5x95, 3x5x135#

Bench - 10x45, 5x65, 5x95, 3x5x125#

Sumo Deadlift - 5x65, 5x95, 5x135, 5x175#

After considering the last squat day, 165# was not lifted with good form. My lift of 155 wasn't great either, so I've backed down to 135, in an effort to focus on the form of the lift again. I'll be making slower progressions on this to allow time for the body to adjust to the weight and not cheat by using my back instead of my legs.

As for the Deadlift, I'm approaching my maximum lifetime lift, which was somewhere around 210#. I feel that the rate this is going, I'll probably have to slow down the increases, but I'll keep pushing it as long as I'm able.

I'm also going to modify my stated goal for day 20. I see that I said 3x5x125# for the bench. I'm going to push that up to 3x5x135#, which is what I think I originally meant.

Day 12

15 minutes on stat bike - fat burn setting

Squat - 5x65, 5x95, 5x135, 3x5x165#

Shoulder Press - 5x45, 5x65, 3x5x85#

I've set a goal for day 20. Bench a minimum of 3x5x125#

Day 11

22 minutes on treadmill - 5.8 speed, random program

Toe Press - 10x95, 10x135, 10x155, 10x175#

3 sets of back extension and sit up, 10 reps each set

The treadmill kinda sucked today. The deck would pause momentarily now and again, which made me lurch each time. It was pretty consistently happening when my left foot struck, so I was unsure if it was the deck, or my gait. Either way, annoying.

Day 9 + 10

Day 9 was a rest day, so I did nothing physical.

Day 10

15 minutes on stat bike, fat loss program, level 4

Squat - 5x65, 5x95, 5x135, 3x5x155#

Bench - 10x45, 5x95, 5x115, 3x5x125# (failed 5,4,4)

Sumo Deadlift - 5x45, 5x95, 5x135, 5x155#

Day 8

20 minute run on treadmill @5.8, random program.

Seated Preacher curl - 10x25#

Seated Preacher curl (10/10/10 set, lower, upper, full) - 3x45#

Dumbell curl - 15, 10, 5# done in sets of 5 until first set fails, then lowering weight, or until 50 reps done.

Seated Overhead Tricep Press - 2x35, 2x30#

Barbell Shrug - 10x45, 10x95, 3x10x135#

Weight: 210.8# (-1.2# if my starting guess of 212# was correct.)

I have been thinking that I should be setting a goal for every 10 days of the 100 days. Nothing based on weight or total number of times to the gym. Something that should be achievable in a 10 day window, and also something that is measurable. Since this 10 day period is almost over, I'm going to retroactively set the goal to have done at least 3x5x135# squat.

I've achieved that goal already, but I may have an opportunity to beat that on Monday, Day 10.

Day 6 + 7

Day 6 was a friend's birthday. I ate cake (and other bad things) and skipped workout to hang out.

Day 7:

15 minutes on stat cycle, cardio setting

Squat - 5x45, 5x65, 5x95, 3x5x135#

Shoulder Press - 5x45, 5x65, 3x5x75#

Short day today, since I got to the gym late.

Day 5

15 minutes on stat cycle, fat burn program

Squat - 5x45, 5x65, 5x95, 3x5x115#

Bench - 10x45, 5x65, 5x95, 3x5x115#

Deadlift - 5x45, 5x95, 5x135#

I forgot to do deadlifts last time I did the squat/bench cycle. So they're back in the rotation. Looking to keep to a Sunday/Tuesday/Thursday cycle for lifting, giving me a 2 day recovery per week. Got to try to get in a run tomorrow, if time and situation allows. I have been looking at Wednesday and Saturday as my free days. So we will see whether I can get to the gym tomorrow or not.

Day 4

Nothing of note for today. Was hanging out with the guys, and didn't hit the gym. Bad on me!

Day 3

Stat Bike - 15 minutes on Cardio. Had to fool with the settings to keep it from going on super-mountain-climbing-mode on me. Eventually got it to give me something I could pedal, while keeping the heart rate up at 141.

Squat - 5x45, 5x65, 5x85, 3x5x105#

Shoulder Press - 10x45, 3x5x65#

3 chin up

Yeah, easy day today. Body's asking for me to take it a bit easier on it. Tomorrow, I go harder.

Day 2

Treadmill - 15 minutes, random @5.6, level 4

Toe Press - 10x45, 10x65, 3x10x75, 10x95#

3x10 Back Extension set with Sit Up

Running is still hard on me. Will need to do more of it. May try variable run times.

Day 1 - Part 2

Workout for today:

Treadmill - 20 minutes, random setting. 2.31km distance @5.6 pace. 5 minutes cooldown.

This was easy for the first 6 minutes or so. Then I was watching the clock on the machine. Managed to put my mind off it, and push through. Got easier again after the 10 minute mark. Then got harder around minute 16. By minute 19 my right leg was starting to complain about the effort. I knew it'd only be another minute, then I'd be at a walking pace, so I paid attention to the way I was moving and kept things going until the clock ran out.

A good start I think.

Day 1

First day of the 100. Feels good to be back doing something again.

Motivation is high right now, but I know I have to keep putting effort into things, or the motivation will drop.

Today's weight: 210.0

For Day 0 I assumed I was about 212. Didn't weigh, assumed. So, maybe I'm down, maybe I'm not. Doesn't matter. This is the weight I am at now. It, and my goal weights are the only ones that matter.

Gym last night was just a short workout.

Stationary Bike for 12 minutes on the Cardio setting to work up a sweat.

Squat - 5x45, 5x65, 5x85, 3x5x95#

Bench - 10x45, 10x65, 3x10x85#

Low Row - 3x10x25#

Walked home and that was it. Gotta make the gym access count again. Clearly I'm not doing everything I could be.

100 days?

Ok... I always get strange ideas in my mind when things like this hit me.

There is (as of today) 113 days left in the year. What if I took 100 of those days, and focused them on fitness.

What can I do with 100 days? Who knows.

Today shall be Day 0. Tomorrow, Day 1.

A bit of here and there

I haven't been following any of my plans for fitness.

Months ago (nearly 4 months at this point). I signed up for the gym. I went for a while. Then stopped. Then went again, then took 3 months off. I suck.

Since then, I've gone from around 193# to my present weight of about 212#. Yes, that's 20 pounds in just about 4 months. FUCK.

I've said to myself that I wouldn't mind being heavier - if I was fit. But I don't feel fit. In fact, I feel really unfit and flabby.

I haven't even been biking. At least then I was doing something. At least then I was getting some serious mileage laid down. I mean, a month or so ago I was polishing off the 450th kilometer in a 30 day period. That's pretty good mileage for a guy that doesn't do anything. Now? 0. Nothing. Not even a little bit.

What is it about me that keeps me in this stupid cycle? I really don't know.

I do know that I don't like the weight I'm at now. Few of the clothes I have now fit me. They're too small. Know why? 'Cause I got down to 185# and told myself that I would never again crack 200. Fuck me. I'm pushing towards 215 at this point. Honestly. How can I do this to myself?

I don't want to set any lofty goals. Anything I put down here will be like a mouthful of sand to me. Still, I can't get by without some kind of goal - some form of direction.

Thus: By the end of October, I want to weigh in at under 200#. That's 10# in 6 weeks.

Yes, that is pushing it. But it is totally possible. Only one way to do it, though. And that is to get off my ass and start working out. Hard. And lots. And also, I must stop eating so much junk.

I hereby put forth my standard diet and exercise plans:

The Stop Eating So Damn Much Diet, and the Get Off Your Fat Ass and Do Something workout plan.

I commit myself to doing this, starting today. I'm gonna need some help.

Deutsch

Yeah. German. Again.

Ok... I keep coming back to this topic.

I read a site called AllJapaneseAllTheTime.com, and it suggests that the best way to learn a language is the natural way. That is, as if you were a child. Children learn to speak by constant exposure. Everyone around them speaks the language, thus, they learn.

However, for those of us unlucky enough not to be fully and completely immersed in our desired language, how is this to work? Well, the AJATT guy suggests that you create the immersion yourself. Specifically, through the introduction of massive amounts of media in the desired language.

I've advocated this before. But I've been very bad at following through on it myself. I've seen (second hand) the effect of allowing this process to work. And I've seen (also second hand) the effect of resisting this process. When you let it work, you learn really fast. When you resist, you don't.

I have tried this method out myself, and I have noticed that it is a good method, overall, for learning the language. Of course, it really works best when coupled with directed, focused learning. Engaging both the active and passive learning modes brings out the best results.

I have some access to German media (thank you, Internet!). But I don't have access to massive amounts of it. This is mainly because I'm too lazy to go searching for the stuff that is accessible out there.

I'd like to start putting myself in contact with more German media. More things to read, more things to listen to, and more stuff to watch. All of them will be exceedingly good for me.

Nothing...

Ok... so after my overnight ride, I haven't touched the bike at all. Dunno quite why. Think I psyched myself out there somehow.

I haven't hit the gym either.

And I eat terribly. Vegetables? What?

So, yeah. I'm a bit over 205# right now, which isn't into the range of unacceptable... but it's really close. I'm not happy with it. But I'm not really doing anything about it either.

I've got to do something to change the way I interact with food.

Loop Ride

Went out with PD again. 60km total ride for me. Long loop around the area. Quite nice.

458 / 450

July 27

Workout:

12 minutes on elliptical, as the treadmill was in use.

Shoulder Press - 10x45, 3x10x55, 3x65#

Hammer Strength Iso-Lateral Pulldown - 10x35, 3x10x45, 5x55#

Hammer Strength Iso Low Row - 10x25, 3x10x35, 5x45#

Bike shop, then loop

Rode up to the bike shop to look into panniers and computers, then rode a big loop home.

36.88km

398.12 / 400

I may have to adjust my mileage for the month again... 450?

July 26

11.5 km ride over to Athalos' place and back.

Went to see Inception with him and the lovely Miss M.

361.25 / 350 km

I'm not sure if I'm going to set a new goal for the month at this point. I suppose I could set 400 as a new goal?

I meant to get to the gym too, but that didn't happen.

July 25

I'm really not doing well with getting to the gym on a regular basis.

Squat - 5x45, 5x65, 3x5x95#

Bench Press - 10x65, 3x10x95, 3x105#

Incline Press - 3x10x75#

Shrug - 3x10x95#

Paris and back

Rode to Paris and back.

54.25km

Apparently, I've added up my mileage wrong. Mapmyrun.com says I have 349.75km as my current ride total this month.

Scott Pilgrim #6

I rode up to Chapters to pick up the new Scott Pilgrim book. Then took the long way home.

25.75km

286.25 / 350 km

Montreal?

I have been doing some planning and thinking about making a bike tour out to Montreal this year. I've been thinking September for the tour, to give me enough time to build up the riding muscles.

I'm assuming the tour will take 12 days to complete. If I want to stay in the month of September, that means I need to ride out by no later than the 18th. That gives me about 58 days of prep time to get ready.

But, I think I'd rather leave a little earlier in the month, to give me a bit better chance of warmer weather. I'm thinking the 10th is going to be a better departure date. That leaves me with only 50 days of remaining time to train, and also to pick up all of the gear that I may need for the tour.

50 days to get up to the expected daily mileage, take a couple of shakedown tours, and at the same time, get used to riding with the pack weight on the bike. That's not a lot of time, but I think it may be enough time - if I start now and take this thing just a bit seriously.

I want to do this thing. I know I can.

July 21

No biking today. Gotta give the legs some recovery time.

Workout tonight:

12 mins on treadmill, 5.2 pace 1% incline as warm up.

Bench - 10x65, 3x10x85, 3x95#

Incline Bench - 10x45, 3x10x55, 10x65, 3x75#

Lateral Raise - 3x10x10#

Hammer Strength Iso Low Row - 10x25, 3x10x35#

Body Weight: 201.6#

There and back again

Dropped in on Athalos and the lovely Miss M. We hit the movies. Biked there and back for a total of 11.75km.

260.5 / 250km

Once again, I've hit my goal. There's about 10 days left in the month. Maybe I can make 350?

Workout thinking

I want to be more fit. I really do. I know that I have the potential to be a pretty good (note: not "great" not "awesome" but "pretty good") athlete. If I put my mind to it and get doing things.

Biking has been very good for me. I don't mind the distance much, and I work hard enough to feel it, but not so hard that I'm debilitating myself along the way.

Lifting has also been good for me, in the past. I like lifting. The feeling of hefting a previously unhefted amount of steel overhead is pretty damn awesome. But here, I push too hard and get hurt. Still, it's good for me, if I can just find a way to keep it in check a little bit so that I don't injure myself.

I have a desire for fitness, but I find I haven't got a real motivating force. I can motivate myself by simply pushing myself to do stuff, but that wears thin after a couple of weeks. I need some external motivator to push me, or I need something internal. A reason to keep at it.

So far, finding that reason has been impossible. And, while external motivation is good, it relies on whatever external factor is motivating to stay there constantly. That's tiring for any person to do, and most external situations are temporary.

Goals help, but I find that I'm either too lofty, or not lofty enough when selecting them. Almost always, I end up on the too lofty side.

For biking, I have my external goal. Montreal. 65+ km per day. That's a real, driving force for me. I want to do it. I can do it. I just need to be out there on the bike and ride. And it's worked so far. When I get really serious about it, it'll work even better.

But for all the rest, diet, lifting, running, I don't have a goal. There's no external force that'll remind me that if I don't do the training, I'll never get to enjoy the rewards.

I've thought about signing up for a race. A small one. 5K, maybe. And train for that. But, I don't really want to run a race. I don't want to have to push myself to do 5K, just so that I can come in not-exactly-last. It's not a good motivator for me.

For lifting, I've thought about entering a competition, or pretending to enter one. But, it hasn't helped. I don't think I've got the time or ability to really get into any sort of competition shape.

There's always the idea of a fitness/fatness bet with the guys... but there's no nice way to bring that up, and we're all in such different points in our fitness that there's no way to make the competition even and comparable. I doubt that anyone other than Athalos would even take up the challenge. A two person challenge isn't bad, but I already feel like I'm way behind Athalos in terms of fitness. I'm not sure that it would be a good challenge overall - I'd be very likely to push a bit too hard.

I suppose I could set goals for myself again. But I'm not sure where to start with those right now. My current mindset has been to ignore the weight, and worry about the fitness. If I eat better, and do more physical stuff, the weight will sort itself out.

That's probably a good thing for me, so that I'm not obsessing over calorie counts. Besides, right now, I really don't want to have to restrict myself too much. I know, it goes against the idea of becoming fitter - but as I said, I'm just not sure which way I'm headed with things right now. For a goal to work, it has to be useful. And I can't think of any useful goals with lifting at the moment - other than setting up a target weight and working towards that. Which I probably should be doing anyway.

I suppose that for the moment, I should be looking to make hitting the gym a habit. Past that, everything else will come in its own time.

Circle Cambridge Ride

Rode around the outside edge of Hespeler region. 21.75km

Starts with a long, slow uphill, then becomes mostly flat until Franklin. Franklin is a big downhill for the first half, but I was pushed to the sidewalk by the unhappy drivers. Dundas is all downhill until the bridge, then it's easy goings again.

Took me about 1.5 hours, including time for some grocery shopping just before I got home. I'd say 80 minutes total.

248.75 / 250km

Thoughts on workouts

I've always been pretty good about writing or telling people about my successes. I think most people are. We want recognition for the things we've done. Besides, a little praise is a great motivator.

I've been less good about telling people about the problems I have. I don't mean about injuries or physical limitations - I'm pretty good about telling people about those. Rather, I mean telling people about the things I didn't do, like when I skip a workout, or when I make a workout easier than it should be for myself. I'm also bad about telling people about the poor choices I make when it comes to food. Like, buying a dozen large cookies and eating them all myself. Or buying a carton of ice cream and simply sitting down with it and a spoon and eating until I don't feel like I want ice cream any more.

Well, this post is hopefully the start of a change for the better. I'd like to be a bit more open about my failings, and not just my successes.

As a starter, today was a pretty good day. I got a bike ride in this morning. I got to the gym this evening, even though I rode. I had intended to do some squats, but chickened out of them, and made up an all arm day workout instead. On the food side of things, I picked fries over rice or salad, and I bought myself a carton of ice cream - though I didn't eat that much of it.

I'd like to make some changes in the way I eat. I know I'm not very good at making the healthy choices. I also know that the best way to make healthier choices is to have healthy food around. Nothing that could be considered unhealthy. I'll have to go through the kitchen and clear things out. I'm already eliminating the trash from the rest of the house, I might as well carry on through there too.

July 18

Workout:

Treadmill - 14 minutes @5.2, 1% incline

Bench Press - 10x45, 10x65, 3x10x75, 3x85#

Incline Bench - 10x45, 3x10x5, 3x65#

Preacher Curl - 10x25, 10x35, 3x10x45#

Lateral Raise - 3x10x10#

Hammer Strength Iso Low Row - 10x25, 3x10x45#

Sunday Ride

14.25km

227 / 250km

Long ride

46.25km today, all over the place.

Total km so far:

212.75 / 250km

Game night

Rode over to Lindorm's place for games. 10.5km overall.

163.5 /250

Movie night!

Rode up to the theatre to watch Despicable Me. Wasn't a bad film. Stopped at the bookstore to pick up Scott Pilgrim #4 and #5. Then rode to shop for a burger, and then home.

23km

156 / 150km

I have reached my goal, and it's only the 13th. That's pretty awesome in my opinion. I'm just gonna keep tracking how far I go. And, I'll reset the goal to 250km this month. I should be able to make the extra 100km.

Workout

My last workout in my logbook was May 30. That's a month and a half of time lost. Stupid me. Real stupid.

Gah! I pay my money, and then I don't use the gym. Why!

So, I went today. Time to get something for my money:

15 minutes on treadmill to warm up.

Bench: 12x45#, 12x65#, 3x12x75#

Hammer Strength Tricep Pressdown: 3x12x70#

Decline Bench: 12x45#, 2x12x55#

Bicep Curl: 3x12x10#

Not much of a workout, but a start. I'm always starting!

Errands

Another errand run. Rode to mall to get new socks, then took long way around to get some crickets, then long way to grocery store, then home. 10km total.

133 / 150km

Long (for me) ride

Rode to New Dundee and back. 44km total.

Nice ride, about 3 hours total time out. That's 14.67kph. Slow, but average for me.

But, about 30 minutes of that was shopping, and resting after shopping. So, that's 17.6kph, which is a good bit faster than my usual speed.

On the ride I bought 2 bananas, a popsicle (cherry) and 2L of ice cream (cookies and cream). Going to rest up for a bit today I think.

123 / 150km

Errands

Quick ride to get some shopping done. 7.75km

79/150 km

Long ride around

21.5km riding about with Athalos. Mostly street riding. Hit the game store, food, then off to visit Miss M and then off to just ride for a bit. Some hills, nothing too major overall.

70.25 / 150km

Biking

Rode 10.25km to hang out with friends and play in a really long M:TG game.

58.75 / 150

Grocery run

8.75km on bike.

Picked up some groceries from the store. Went a bit of a senic route. I need to do more loaded riding to get used to the difference in feel over unloaded riding.

Grabbed me 6 sesame bagels, a block of 5 year-old cheddar, 1.75L Lemonade, 2 pounds of Empire apples, 5 bananas and 2 avocados. A good ride.

48.5 / 150km

Mileage

13.75km today.

Rode over to Athalos' place - he got called away to work. Rode on to grocery store, picked up a few things, fries at the fry place, rode home. Ice cream bars. Yummy!

Total: 39.75 /150km

Biking

Today I got 26Km done. Variable street, back highway and trail. Got a lot of sun. Need to remember to pack sunscreen. Also got the Brakes fixed. Total riding time was just over an hour.

Hills were relatively low, with what I would call mid-length medium grades. Pushed through and kept off the smallest chainring the whole ride.

I need to do more of this.

July: 26 / 150

Biking: June

I'd set a modest goal of 50km for the last part of June. I was at 49.25km for the last few days, but riding home from work today covered the distance by a long shot. 9.25km from work to home to bring June's total to 58.5km.

July has a target goal of 150km.

I've been thinking that if I ride the full distance to and from work 3 days out of 4, should rack up about 57km per week. I should, just from getting to and from work, be able to go almost 230km. So, 150km should be easy enough.

Biking again

Got on the bike with Athalos today. We're planning a big bike trip later in the year, so we need to start riding more.

13.75km ride today.

June total: 49.25 of 50.0 goal.

So... I could do circles in the parking lot for a few minutes and make up the distance necessary.

I've still got a few days to do the last little bit. Cool.

Friday

Rode bike around a bit. 11.75km

June total: 35.5km

Bike

Went on a ride yesterday. Did a loop from the house up to the Chapters, then back down to home again, stopping for a panzarotti on the way home.

Total: 16.25km.

This will start up my biking journal. I'd like to do a few longer rides this year, so I've got to start building up my riding ability.

I also did a short ride to Athalos' place and back, a total of 7.5km.

So, June total: 23.75km

Desired total: 50km

I'm hoping to start doing weekend rides of 20km or more, with an eye to do up at least 150km over the month of July.

Off wagon

So I fell off all the wagons I was on. Diet, exercise, everything.

To sum up, I'm eating poorly again, and haven't been exercising.

I'm getting back to it all again though.

I got to the gym on Monday and did 25 minutes on the treadmill at an average pace of about 5.8.

I also got out the bike and have been trying to ride that more as well.

APoD

I'm way behind on this. I've got 20 days to do 31 models. So, this is going to go way up in priority for me and my time at home.

June 7, 8, and 9

Ok... it's been a bad week for getting to the gym. I've done nothing this week so far. And have been totally off diet, and off even weighing myself or counting calories. Yay me?

Wednesday's weight was 192.6#, and I have no idea how not exercising and eating badly make me lose weight. There's no sense to it!

June 4, 5, 6

I got in a quick workout on the 4th. 45 minutes on treadmill.

No workout on the 5 + 6. A combination of too lazy and too busy.

No weighings that I remembered, and I did not bother to track foods. Eating ranged from light grazing to heavy consumption. Generally, I've done things wrong.

My mental stresses are much lower now, but not gone.

June 3

Mental breakdown evening. No workout.

Weight: 195.8#

Calories: about 2700

Get down

I've had a goal for weight loss for over seven weeks now. My total loss so far is just 2.6#. That's not a good sign.

I have been reasonable with my diet, but not great. I've have been good with my workouts, but not intense. I have been diligent, but not consistent.

It's the "but nots" that have stymied me.

I want to weigh less. I want to look and feel better. I want to not have this gut.

But wanting something is not the same as doing something about it. I know this. And while knowing is half the battle, the other half is effort. I don't think I've been doing much on that half lately.

Keeping a diet record these last three days has been good. I can see that my diet isn't horrible. It's about 2000 calories a day. That's maintenance weight for me. Especially with the foods that I eat. To lose, I need to aim at about 1800 a day. A rather different amount of food. And I need to really cut back on the starches and sugars.

I have done some good things. I have made some good changes. I skip out on fries and burgers. I don't drink any cola. I drink a lot more water. I get to the gym.

But I haven't done some of the things I should be doing. I'm not consistent with fruit, and don't eat enough veg. I do not get the amount or kind of sleep that I should be getting.

These are all changes that impact the choices I make. Why I haven't made them, I'm not sure. But, I think it's time for some adjustements in the way I carry out my days.

Week seven

I started at 198.8#

Week 1 was 200.6.# (up 1.8#)

Week 2 was 198.6# (down 2#, down 0.2# total)

Week 3 is 197.4# (down 1.2#, down 1.4# total)
Week 4 is 196.2# (down 1.2#, down 2.6# total)

Week 5 is 196.6# (up 0.4#, down 2.2# total)

Week 6 is 196.2# (down 0.4#, down 2.6# total)

Week 7 is 196.2# (no change, down 2.6# total)

Clearly, nothing is working. Or, more accurately, doing nothing is doing nothing.

July 2

Very tired, went to bed early, no workout.

Weight: 196.2#

Calories: 2240

June 1

Slacked today to play games.

Weight: 195.4#
Calories: 1896

May 31

35 minutes on treadmill, random program level 4, @5.2

Weight: 195.4#
Calories: 1925

Calories are ok, but the balance of fats and such are all way off. I'm just going to observe this week, and make changes next week.

May 30

Warm up: 12.5 minutes on treadmill @ 5.5, 1% incline

Workout:

Squat - 5 reps: 45, 65, 95, 105, 105, 105#
Shoulder Press - 5 rep: 45, 55, 65, 75, 75, 75#
Power Clean - 3 rep: 45, 50, 50, 50, 50, 50#

Cool Down: 12 minutes on treadmill @ 5.2, 1% incline

Weight: 195.4#

Clearly, my diet control is lacking. I shall start a journal Monday.

Calorie counting

I've been thinking I should be tracking my daily foods lately. Track what I eat, their total calories, and the relative macronutrients (protein, carb, fat) in everything.

On the one hand, this would do a good job of keeping me on track for weight loss, but it would also do a good job of informing me of what I am eating too much and what I am not getting enough.

The downside is that I'd need to write all this stuff down, and that I'd need to reconcile it all at some point in the day. Still, I think I may go down this route this week.

May 28

31 minutes on treadmill @5.4kph 1% incline

Hammer Strength lat pulldown machine: 10x35#, 5x70#, 5x60# each arm
Hammer Strength tricep dip machine: 10x50#, 10x70#, 2x10x90#

Weight: 194.6#

May 27

Warm up: 12 minutes treadmill @5.4kph, 1% incline

Squat - 5 reps each: 45, 65, 95, 105, 105, 105#
Bench Press - 5 reps each: 45, 55, 65, 75, 75, 75#
Deadlift - 5 reps each: 65, 95, 105, 120#

3x2 Chin up

Cool down: 12 minutes treadmill @5.2kph, 1% incline

Weight: 196.2#

Week six

I started at 198.8#

Week 1 was 200.6.# (up 1.8#)

Week 2 was 198.6# (down 2#, down 0.2# total)

Week 3 is 197.4# (down 1.2#, down 1.4# total)
Week 4 is 196.2# (down 1.2#, down 2.6# total)

Week 5 is 196.6# (up 0.4#, down 2.2# total)

Week 6 is 196.2# (down 0.4#, down 2.6# total)

This appears to be a failure so far.

With my goal weight of 185# by June 30, that leaves me with just 5 weeks to lose 11.2 pounds. That's just over 2 pounds per week. It's still in the realm of possibility - but I need to really commit to the goal now. No more dallying.

Get focused, man!

May 26

Meant to visit with Lindorm and friends, leave a bit early and then hit the gym for treadmill time.

I visited, but stayed later than I should have. Midnight does not make a great time for working out. So I skipped.

Weight: 196.6#

The weight is nice and stable now. Which is entirely not what I want at all.

May 25

Warm up: 12 minutes treadmill @5.4kph 1% incline

Workout:

Squat - 5 reps each: 45, 65, 95, 95, 95#
Shoulder Press - 5 reps each: 45, 55, 65, 65, 65#
Power Clean - 3 reps each: 45, 45, 45, 45, 45#

3x2 slow pull up negatives

Cool down: 12 minutes treadmill @5.2kph 1% incline

Weight: 196.2#

APoD

I took some models with me over the weekend, hoping to get them painted. It didn't happen. Combination of bad (insufficient) lighting and tiredness got to me. I managed to move 10 models from primed to green, though, which I suppose is at least a little bit of a win for me.

There is just 7 days (including today) before the end of the month. This will be the end of month 5 of APoD. I committed to 12 models a month, which means I should be finishing up my 60th model. I have about 35 painted in total. I am way, way behind. Can I complete 25 models in 7 days? That's a bit more than 3 per day. Difficult, but not wholly impossible.

I intend to try.

May 24

A bit of walking today while geocaching. Not really enough workout to justify the amount of food I've eaten over the last few days though.

Weight: 193.5#

Today and yesterday's weight were done with the in-law's scale. It doesn't quite match my scale, so it tends to be low.

May 23

Bike ride today: 12.5km in about an hour. I have a rather slow biking pace. But good for a starter ride.

Weight: 192.5#

May 22

Rest day today.

Weight: 195.2#

May 21

I'm working my way back up to running again, so I'm focusing on building my walking pace first, and then back to slow jogging.

3km treadmill @ 5.2kph pace. 40 minutes including cool down on machine.

3x3 jumping pull ups
3x5 15# bicep curl
1x5 20# bicep curl

3x5 70# per arm Hammer Strength Low Row machine.

Weight: 195.6#

May 20

Joined the gym today because I missed lifting weights.

Warm up:

10 minutes @ 5.0kph pace on treadmill, 1% incline

Workout:

It's been a long time since I did any lifting, so I'm starting slow and low.

Squats - 5 reps: 45, 65, 95, 95, 95#
Bench Press - 5 reps: 45, 55, 65, 75, 85, 85, 85
Deadlift - 5 reps: 45, 65, 96, 105, 105

10 minutes @ 5.0kph pace on treadmill, 1% incline

3x1 chin up on parallel bars

Weight: 196.6#

Least to Beast: Update

Updates already! Woo!

Here's the strength goals I stated today.

Mission Statement: Strength and fitness. Better look.

Main Strength Goals: Lift weights. Weighted squat, bench press, shoulder press.

Current Strength Goal: Join gym.

I have joined a gym. 5 months paid in advance. No excuses now.

So, time for a new goal.

Current Strength Goal: Strength workout - 3 days a week.

Pushup plans

I have been keeping up with the daily push up regimen. At the start of the week, I notched up the total daily push ups to 25. By Tuesday, I'd changed that to 30 per day. That is where it is going to sit for now.

I'll be starting a push up progression program next week on Monday, but I will be working on it some this week as well.

The general progression is really straightforward. 3 times a week, I do 3 sets of maximum push ups. 2 minutes rest between sets. I simply record the total numbers, and strive to do better each time.

Least to Beast?

I had considered titling this "Run fat boy! Run!" but decided against it, as running is only a part of the whole package.

As I've been saying all week, I've been thinking I need to make a change. To be accurate, a lot of changes. I'm looking at a change in diet, workout routine, type and intensity, and a change in overall attitude towards fitness.

To do this, I'm simply going to lay out a set of goals, and work towards them. I don't want to flood myself with stretch goals, but I do want to have a goal that is going to take some effort, and a goal that should be immediately achievable (or at least achievable within a week or so).

Diet:

Mission Statement: Eat better.

Main Goals: Less starches, more fruit and veg, more protein.

Current Goal: More fruit, minimum of 1 per day.

Workout:

Mission Statement: Strength and fitness. Better look.

Main Strength Goals: Lift weights. Weighted squat, bench press, shoulder press.

Current Strength Goal: Join gym.

Main Cardio Goals: Run 3 miles under 20:00.

Current Cardio Goal: Start 5 times a week "get back to running" program.

Main Bodyweight Goals: 50 pushups, 20 pull ups

Current Bodyweight Goal: Start 3 week pushup builder program.

Weight:

Mission Statement: Be lighter.

Main Goal: Weigh 175# by end of July.

Current Goal: Weight 185# by end of June.

I realize that I'm adding on 4 new goals for myself, bringing myself to 5. But I can do it.

Week five

I started at 198.8#

Week 1 was 200.6.# (up 1.8#)

Week 2 was 198.6# (down 2#, down 0.2# total)

Week 3 is 197.4# (down 1.2#, down 1.4# total)
Week 4 is 196.2# (down 1.2#, down 2.6# total)

Week 5 is 196.6# (up 0.4#, down 2.2# total)

I'm up (just a bit) this week. But that's another week with no progress to show for it. My chart is going to flatten out if I keep going this way.

May 19

Another lost day. I won't make any progress this way.

Weight: 196.6#

May 18

Had plans to work out. Went over the Athalos' place and stayed there until far too late. Did not get anything done.

Weight: 196.0#

Now, as an add on, I do have the following other things to say.

1. I'm pushing the daily push ups up from 20 to 25. I may change and go to 30 if I find 25 too easy. These have been going really well. Such that I can do a set of 10 with little issue. When I started, 10 was really hard. Slow progress is the way to go for me.

2. I am going to start a running program. Ease into running again. I know I like it, my mind just doesn't remember yet.

3. I'm debating with myself over a "Least to Beast" kind of thing. That's what happens when I spend some time debating the merits of gyms, competitions and heavy stacks of steel.

Tracking for Goals

There's 6 weeks and a day until the end of June. I have set a goal for myself of 185#. I am currently 196#. That's 11 pounds in 6 weeks.

Just under 2# a week.

It's totally possible to do, yet, my current rate of progress has been just 1.2# per week. Not nearly the 2# per week goal rate.

Why? I am exercising, but little if any of it is cardio.

I am eating marginally better, but I haven't been giving my diet any real thought or planning. I've just been going about things in pretty much the same way as always.

I need to shake things up. Make a change for the better.

What I "Should" be doing...

I've been doing a lot of thinking lately related to fitness. A lot of "should" in my life right now.

I should be running, or at least working up to running again.

I should be altering my diet in noticeable ways, including food selection, amount, preparation, and frequency.

I should be keeping up a regular schedule of workouts, with varied activity and intensity.

I should be biking more.

I should be learning how to play a sport of some kind.

I should be learning how to swim.

I should be sleeping more.

I should join a gym and get some lifting done.

With so much should, it feels like there isn't any place to start. But I know that's not true. I know that all I need to do with those shoulds, is just get started.

May 17

Got in my pushups, and talked about fitness stuff a bit. Nothing else done. Got a thought in my mind...

Weight: 195.8#

Motivation and drive

Recently (as in: this weekend) my friend G attended the IDFA middleweight championships as a competitor. I had known for some time that he had been working towards this goal (at least 6 months, probably closer to 9). I also knew that he was in pretty good shape to start.

I did not expect him to win - but he did.

Which made me think.

He set a goal for himself. A big one. And carried it out. I've set goals for myself and fall short. Why? What's different between what he's done, and what I keep failing to do?

Dedication? Probably. He fixed his mind to the task, and stuck through everything to get there. I tend to be dedicated at the start, but it drops off quick.

Persistance? Also probably. My persistance on a task can be really low. For me, persistance is like dedication, but comes after dedication fails. Persistance is all about picking yourself back up and re-dedicating yourself to the goal. And, the shorter the timeframe between falling down and getting back up, the better.

Self-control? Maybe. I do tend to make poor choices for myself, and even when I notice I'm making a poor choice, I just keep going with it.

These are things that give me trouble. I need to start enforcing my own decisions, and keeping myself focused, dedicated and on task. I need to be persistent. I need to keep getting up just one more time than I've been knocked down.

I know I can do it. I know I can.

May 14 + 15 + 16

Another weekend where I get no workouts in at all.

May 14: I kept at the pushups on Friday, but other than maybe an extra 5 pushups, I didn't do anything. Worked the bar until the wee hours, and didn't get to sleep until very late.

Weight: 198.6#

May 15: Got up with the kids, to get them to classes, then off to see if my drum lesson was on (it wasn't). Over to the store to play a game. That evening went off to hang out with the others for after-party stuff. Again, up until way too late. No exercise at all, aside from maybe one set of push ups that morning.

Weight: 198.4#

May 16: I'm tired and ragged this morning. I don't get much done, and I spend a lot of the afternoon sleeping. I consider a workout in the evening, but don't in the end.

Weight: 197.4#

I have to get in a workout today. Something, even if it is just a run.

Push up, sit up, run

Those are the main areas tested in the US army physical fitness test (PFT). You have to score a minimum of 50 points in each area to pass the PFT. Here's what someone my age would need:

Push up (2 minutes): 26 (36.. 75)

Sit up (2 minutes): 34 (42.. 76)

2 mile run: 18:48 (17:42.. 13:18)

The values there are minimums, then the value for 60 points (above average) and lastly the value for a full 100 points.

While I'm not going into the army, police or any other department, I think it'd be good to be fit enough to enter if I wanted. I'm thinking that these numbers should be something to work towards. If not set as actual goals, they should at least be something I consider and maybe check against from time to time.

I don't know where my current standings might be at this time, but I can pretty much guarantee that I'd have difficulties getting the minimum standards. I may have to set aside some time this weekend to test myself, and see where I am.

References:

http://www.military.com/military-fitness/army-fitness-requirements/army-physical-fitness-test-score-chart#2

http://www.military.com/military-fitness/army-fitness-requirements/army-pft-sit-up-score-chart#2

http://www.military.com/military-fitness/army-fitness-requirements/army-pft-two-mile-run-score-chart#2

May 13

Burpees: 5..1

Warm up:

100 skips
5 burpees
50 jumping jacks
5 burpees

Skill work:

3x30 sec frog stand

Workout:

5x10 10# thrusters

Stretching

Weight: 196.8#

May 12

Warm up:

100 skips
5..1 burpees
100 skips

Skill work:

3x40 sec handstand

Workout:

30, 20, 10 reps of each:
squats
toe press

15, 10, 5 reps of each:
lunge
jump squat

Stretching

Weight: 196.2#

Four weeks

I'm surprised:

So, at the start I was 198.8#

Week 1 was 200.6.# (up 1.8#)

Week 2 was 198.6# (down 2#, down 0.2# total)

Week 3 is 197.4# (down 1.2#, down 1.4# total)
Week 4 is 196.2# (down 1.2#, down 2.6# total)

I'm actually keeping a pace of about 1 pound a week. It's less than I want, but I'm happy to see there is some progress there.

I'm far from where I thought I'd be by now (down 8 pounds total). But I can put in some effort.

I've been doing a lot of thinking about why my diet hasn't been working. And the answer is simple enough. Though I am following the rules against burger and fries, and the rules against cola, I've been making a lot of poor choices.

What I need to do is stop planning what to do, and start deciding what I want to do. And then following through on those decisions.

A challenge!

Athalos has suggested the burpee challenge... the idea is to start at 1 burpee per day, and by adding 1 burpee per day, you work your way up to 100 burpees.

I've tried the half challenge before, but 50 per day was too much. With no break days, I was left with some pretty harshed shoulders and elbows. So, I've declined.

Instead, I suggested working our way up slower. Slower progressions I can do.

We have somewhat decided on the prisoner burpee workout. 20..1. Well, building up to that amount. Starting with 5..1. And adding a set at the top each week.

I think I can hold that pace, though, I'm not sure. But, I'll take the challenge on.

Paint Goals...

The Apocalypse Paint or Die thing is still going on. It's May now, and the end of June is the drop dead date. So far, I've painted exactly 0 models this month. That's bad. Especially since I'm behind.

I've tried setting goals for myself to paint, but they've been pushed off. Instead, I'm going to set a slightly different goal. A situational goal.

This situational goal is thus:

Each evening, at about 9:00, I want to be at my table, with the paints out, water ready, and at least one model sitting and waiting for paint.

There is no goal to paint said model(s), simply to have the environment set up and ready at about 9:00.

I'm going to give this a try, and see if it helps.

German

I'm still working on the German studies. Actual study is pretty slow, but just listening to German is getting easier. It helps to play stuff I like.

May 11

Warm up:

3 rounds:
30 jumping jacks
5 burpees

Skill work:

3x40 sec yoga headstand

Workout:

5x10 25# shoulder press
5x10 10# dumbell flies
3x5 25# kettlebell snatch

Stretching

Weight: 196.0#

I have no idea what the weight is doing. I'm just trying to be good about snacking and eating - and generally failing.

May 10

It's taking me a bit of time to get back into the swing of working out on a regular basis. This is always the trouble after getting sidetracked and discouraged.

I know I just need to focus and get back to it.

Weight: 196.6#

May 7 + 8 + 9

I missed my workout on the 7th. I considered calling it a rest day, but didn't, as I'd just had one.

May 8, I meant to work out, but didn't get around to where I could start on it until the day was over. 11 PM over. So, no workout that day either.

May 9, not only did I not get a workout done, but I ate like crap. Pizza, chocolate and bagels.

During these three days, my weight shot up to the 198 range again, and generally discouraged me.

I know I haven't been vigilant enough. I know that I need to combine what I'm eating with what I'm doing for exercise. There is no other path.

May 6

Warm up:

2 minutes skipping
5..1 burpees
2 minutes skipping

Skill work:

3x30 sec Frog Stand - I can't do these straight yet, so they're really closer to 6x15 seconds.

Workout:

3 rounds of:
20 Squat
15 25# Kettlebell Swing
10 Lunge
5 Jump Squat
5 Backward Lunge

5x20 toe press

Stretching

Weight: 197.6#

May 5

Rest day.

Weight: 197.4#

Three weeks

Three weeks already? How is that possible?

So, at the start I was 198.8#

Week 1 was 200.6.# (up 1.8#)

Week 2 was 198.6# (down 2#, down 0.2# total)

Week 3 is 197.4# (down 1.2#, down 1.4# total)

I must say that progress is slower than expected. It is consistent, though. If the trend from earlier in the week had continued, I'd be down to somewhere in the 195 range, but I shot up quite a bit over the last two days, eliminating most of my progress.

It's a balancing act for me with food and effort, and I'm still making a lot of mistakes along the way.

I've been keeping on the 15 push up per day minimum, and am thinking of pushing it up to 20 per day minimum. I have not been on the horizontal rows, though. I will need to make an effort to get those started.

May 4

I'm giving my foot some consideration today, as it's still a bit sore. So, I'm keeping things more towards the upper body.

Warm up:

5x5 push ups

Skill work:

4x40 seconds handstand

Workout:

3x60 sec plank
5x10 30# bent over row
5x5 horizontal row

Stretching

Weight: 198.0#

Ow

Ok, so I hurt my foot trying to land a jump yesterday while messing around. I'd tweaked it earlier doing the exact same thing, but since it didn't hurt then, I didn't really pay attention to it. Had I paid attention, I might not have done any more jumps - but, I probably would have anyway.

It was sore all evening, and is a bit sore this morning. I expect it to be fine by this evening, though, so I can do a proper workout.

May 3

Made a light day of it, just basically playing and running about at the playground with the kids.

I landed a jump a bit wrong, and made my ankle sore, but I think it will be fine.

Weight: 196.6#

May 2

Warm up:

2 minutes skipping
5 burpees
40 jumping jacks
5 burpees

Skill work:

4x30 sec handstand hold - I did three small range of motion presses in each hold. Figure it will put a bit more effort into these holds.

Workout:

5x10 25# kettlebell shoulder press
3x10 30# tricep press
5x5 chair dips
5x10 10# flies
3x3 30# curl

Stretching

Weight: 196.6#

May 1

It's the start of the month, so it's time to get things going and notch up the intensity a bit.

Warm up:

10 squat
5 burpees
2 minutes jump rope
5 burpees
10 lunges
5 burpees

Skill work:

3x40 sec yoga headstand

Workout:

3x15 crunch
3x10 supermans
3x25 10# mason twists

Stretching

Weight: 195.8#

I find I am exceptionally poor at crunches. Something about them always come across wrong. Bad neck position, or arm position, or simply weak abdominal muscles. All three likely.

The state of things

So, I've got my two preparatory weeks out of the way, and things seem to be on track. It's been a little difficult to eat right and keep my motivation up at the same time, but I think they're going the way I want them to go.

Tomorrow really starts off the big cycle. My main goal of being at 175 by the end of July is still there. With it comes my other goal of being at 185 by the the end of June. Progress is being made on both of these.

I have been considering adding in another goal to go with these, but I think I have enough goals right now. Maybe once I'm closer to these ones.

That said, I do think I'd like to bump up the intensity of my workouts. That's a simple enough process. Take shorter rests (I've been taking pretty long rests), and put in things that are a little more challenging. I can do both of those things. But, just a bit more intensity. I need to ramp up slowly.

As a part of this, I'm going to try to add in a few exercises through the day. I'm thinking mostly about push ups (as they can be done anywhere). I'm thinking a minimum of 15 or so a day? Broken into tiny sets of 5. That should be a good start for now.

Apr 30

Warm up:

2 minutes run in place
5 burpees
2 minutes run in place
5 burpees
2 minutes run in place

Skill work:

3x60 sec plank

Workout:

5x5 push up
5x5 horizontal rows
5x10 30# bent over row

Stretching

Weight: 196.0#

Two Weeks

A bit late on this, as the 2 week mark was actually the 28th.

So, at the start I was 198.8#

Last week I was 200.6.# (up 1.8#)

This week I was 198.6# (down 2# from last, down 0.2# total).

So, the downward trend has finally started.

I know that my body has a couple of natural resting points with weight. Where I can eat a generally poor diet and as long as my activity level is higher than nothing, the weight will stay constant. somewhere around 198# is one of those points. So is somewhere around 210#, but I don't want to get to there.

The next stable point that I know of is about 185#. Between 198 and 185 is a tricky place for my weight. While I'm closer to 198, the weight will want to drift back up to that point. But as I get close to 185, it will want to stay near that weight instead, and should drop pretty quick to get close to it, and then slow down and stick for a couple days.

Consistency is the key here. If I eat better (like I have been trying to do), and keep up with the workouts like I have been doing, then I should be able to make progress.

There's just 8 weeks ahead of me here, which is both a long time and a short time. There's a lot between here and there. Consistency, and vigil. Those will see me to my goal.

Apr 29

Warm up:

3 rounds of:
30 jumping jacks
5 burpees

Skill Work:

3x40 sec Yoga headstands

Workout:

3x20 squat
3x15 25# kettlebell swings
3x10 lunges
3x5 squat jump

Stretching

Weight: 197.2#

Apr 28

Rest day.

Weight: 198.6#

Apr 27

Warm up:

15 squat
5 burpees
30 jumping jacks

Skill work:

3x30 sec frog stand (though not in a continuous burst... I'm working on this one)

Workout:

5x5 push up
3x5 chair dip
5x5 25# shoulder press
3x3 25# kettlebell snatch (this is new for me, so I'm only doing a few of them to learn the movement)

Stretching

Weight: 198.4#

Apr 26

Warm up:

2 minutes running in place
5..1 burpees
2 minutes running in place

Skill work:

3x30 handstand against a wall

Workout:

3x15 crunchs
3x10 supermans
3x25 10# mason twists

Stretching

Weight: 198.0#

Diet Planning

I promised a post on my diet planning, but didn't get to it that day. So, you get it today.

I've been debating what kind of diet plan I want to follow for a couple of weeks now. Going over all the different options. I'm very against the idea of using any sort of pill to suppress hunger. I feel that's a bad way to go, since it doesn't teach you to eat any less.

I also don't like any diet that vilifies any particular nutrient or food group, with the possible exception of sugar.

I've tried counting calories before, and it's a good method for me. But it does take a lot of focus and thought. Meals need to be pre-planned, or else you end up with times where you're simply unable to eat. Still, a simple framework is usually good enough to block out the general amounts of food you can/should eat.

My friend Lindorm is involved in a diet challenge with his co-workers. Most percentage lost wins the pot ($20 per person involved). His lady J is joining him for the home version. They aren't counting calories. Rather, they're watching portion sizes, and trying to make healthier choices. With that, Lindorm is also banning all fast food, and limiting himself on sugars.

I've thought before about limiting my sugar intake, but it's really difficult to do. There's sugar in most things that I like to eat. Which, I suppose, makes sense.

I've also thought about eliminating fast food from my diet as well. That should be possible to do, it just means a little more effort ensuring that I have lunches planned out in advance.

I suppose that the main debate is whether or not it is going to be worthwhile for me to track calories. To really track them properly, I would need to find a kitchen scale and weigh out the food that I am going to eat so that I can know the correct number of calories. Without that, the best I can do is guess, which seems like a pretty poor way to go about trying to track calories.

Portion control is another possibility. Rather than tracking the exact calories, I can simply try (like my friend Lindorm) to limit the amount I eat, and to try to make sure that I eat balanced and complete meals.

For now, I think this may be the better plan for me. It keeps me from having to calculate every bit of food that I eat. I'll try it for a couple of weeks, and if there's no results from it (or not the ones I want) then I'll try calorie counting again.

With that set, here's my general diet plan:

1. Control the amount of food I eat. Have smaller portions, and only a single helping of anything.

2. Include more vegetables. Keeping in mind that a proper meal contains protein, starch and fat in balanced proportions.

3. Fry things less. Try to boil, bake or broil food more.

4. Limit refined sugars.

5. Eliminate all sodas, including diet sodas.

6. A ban on "burger and fry" fast food places.

These are the main tenants of the plan.

Apr 25

Warm up:

30 jumping jacks
5 burpees
30 jumping jacks
5 burpees
30 jumping jacks
5 burpees

Skill work:

3x5 Divebomber push up

Workout:

3x10 squats
3x10 25# kettlebell swings
3x10 lunges
3x30 toe press

Stretching

Weight: 198.4#

Apr 24

Warm up:

2 minutes jog in place
5..1 burpees
2 minutes job in place

Skill work:

3x15 seconds handstand against wall

Workout:

3x10 25# kettlebell shoulder press
3x10 30# overhead triceps press
3x10 10# dumbbell flies

Stretching

Weight: 199.6#

Apr 23

In keeping with the post from earlier today, I'm going to follow my workout format.

Warmup:

30 jumping jacks
5 burpees
30 jumping jacks
5 burpees
30 jumping jacks
5 burpees

Skill work:

3x30 second yoga headstand

Workout:

3x10 25# bent-over row
3x5 pushups
3x5 chair dips
3x5 25# dumbell pullover

Stretching

Weight: 200.8#

Workout Program

I could debate on things forever, and never get anything done. I'm trying pretty hard not to do too much planning, and just do a lot more doing. Still, I know I need some kind of structure, or I just spin my wheels and go nowhere.

For now, I'd like to stay away from the idea of workout goals. I usually take them on, but I find I'm a bit to aggressive in striving for them, and that usually ends up with me being injured. I'm going to make an effort to go a little more slowly.

As far as a program goes, I've been trying to frame up something loose enough to be flexible to the time I have available, while also being structured enough to keep me on track. Here's what I've got so far:

1. Warm up (2 to 3 exercises with high repetitions that get the body moving)

2. Skill work (a single specific exercise that needs the body to have energy to spare. Handstands, balance, or another specific area that needs work)

3. Workout (3 to 5 exercises, with low to medium reps to stress the body and build muscle)

4. Stretching

I'll put diet stuff in its own post later today, as I expect that to be a longer item.

April 22

Rest day. Hung out with friends tonight, and did geeky things.

Weight: 201

Apr 21

Upper body:

warm up:
30 jumping jacks
3 burpees
20 jumping jacks
2 burpees
10 jumping jacks
1 burpee

3x10 25# shoulder press
2x10 10# tricep kickback
3x5 30# overhead tricep press
3x30 second 30# goblet hold
3x2 30# curl

Weight: 200.6#

One Week

So... a week in and so far, I haven't done much.

I started last week with a weight of 198.8#

This morning I am 200.6# A net gain over the week. That's a bad trend. In fact, it's almost exactly the opposite amount I was hoping to lose per week. So, it's as if I set myself back by 2 weeks.

Disappointing, but not unexpected.

I didn't do much for workouts, and I didn't do much for keeping away from the snacks. Thus, I have gained weight. I don't like it, but I can't change the past. All I can do it make the future better. So, it's time to reaffirm my goals.

I would like to lose about 2 pounds a week between May 1 and July 31. 13 weeks = 26 pounds.

Assuming I use my starting weight of 198.8#, that means I am aiming at a weight of 172.8# by the end of July. 172.8# seems aggressive - and it is. So, I'll adjust it. I'm gonna go with 175# even. That gives me a rate of loss that's a little under 2 pounds a week. Even with my current weight, it's still totally possible.

So, whatever I've said my goal was before, it is officially 175# by July 31 now. And I'm sticking to that.

To get there, I know that I need a couple of things.

1. I need to be dedicated to this goal. I have to put in time and effort to reach it.

2. I need to be focused. What I eat is important. I need to balance out what I take in for food. I need to move towards healthier alternatives, and I need to balance out portion sizes and keep them reasonable.

3. I need a routine. Both a physical activity routine, and a mental routine to keep my on track and working towards my goal.

4. I need competition. I find I work a bit better if I have an external incentive. The best incentive for me is competition. If challenged, I usually try to rise above that challenge.

There's a couple of mental tricks that I'd like to employ too - but I figure I'll leave those for another post.

April 20

Got in a quick workout tonight:

3x10 25# kettlebell swings
3x5 25# kettlebell snatch
3x5 25# kettlebell curls

I know the curls don't do much overall, but they're something, right?

Better workout tomorrow. Hopefully.

Weight: 202.2#

April 19

Athalos and M were over last night to hang out, practice some guitar and generally just do stuff. Quite enjoyable. We worked on getting the guitars tuned up, and working on the basics of playing again.

We did some work on "Good Riddance (Time of Your Life)" which is a fun song, and easy enough to get by just following the chords. I think we'll probably stick with stuff we've a chance of learning for now.

Also got in a bit of painting. I feel very behind on this front, and will need to work really hard to get all the models I need up to the proper level.

There was no time available for workouts though.

Weight: 199.6#

'Cause you gotta have goals

My April 18 post covered my main goal for right now. Losing weight.

I feel that my overall weight is too high. I am too fat, or rather, I have too much fat on me. So, I want to get it off.

I know that it's better to trade out fat for muscle, and that's very much a long term goal for me, but in the short term, I'd like to simply be lighter.

Specifically, I'd like to get down to somewhere around 175#. That represents a loss of 25# from my starting weight of 200 (well, slightly higher).

I know that I can expect a reasonable rate of loss to be no more than about 2# per week. There's 15 weeks from now until July 31. Thus, I should be able to lose as much as 30# in total.

Tracking weight loss alone can be a depressing affair. Especially if, like me, you track it by day, rather than weekly. But, there is a method to my madness. By tracking daily, I reinforce the habit of being conscious of what I am eating, and how much I am eating per day. I can see that eating a bit more on the day before really does show up on the next day's scale.

However, to keep from going crazy with daily tracking and the normal fluctuations in weight, I stick to a couple of simple principals. First, I weight at about the same time in the morning. This makes the comparisons for measurements a lot more consistent. Second, I try not to pay attention to a single day's weight. Rather, I compare it to several previous days, and to the history of weights as a whole. As long as there is a downward trend in the data, then it doesn't matter if today's weight happens to be higher than yesterday's.

By trending the data, I can see whether or not I am making any progress, and I can gauge how well I am progressing.

For now, I am keeping my goals simple. Just the weight loss. As time progresses, I may choose to add in an additional goal or two, but I really do want to try to just focus on one thing at a time.

Guitar

As this is not only fitness but my other diversions as well, I figure it's about time to put something in about me and the guitar. While I'm at it, something about the other instruments I play/want to play too.

Lets start with guitar.

Way back in high school, while I was learning most of the other instruments in the woodwind section, I started to get interested in playing the guitar. My parents had an old acoustic, so I would noodle around with that at bit. Took a few lessons from the school, but nothing serious. Thus started my on again - off again love of the guitar.

About 2 years ago, I managed to pick up a cheap guitar at a sale. I didn't pay much for it, and it's not a fantastic guitar, but it sounds good enough for me, and it works well enough for what I do with it. I named it "Chocolate" and it's been used off and on as the whim strikes me.

At one point, I owned 3 guitars, and had a fourth loaned to me. But, I'm back to just having the one again.

Lately, I've been motivated to learn to really play it this time. To that end, I'm trying to put a little bit of time each day towards noodling around on the guitar. So far it's been unfocused practice. Just hitting chords and trying to remember where the fingers go. A bit of light improv sometimes too, but I haven't been making a serious effort so far. I know that I won't make much gain without structure, but for now, that's fine. Just playing is good enough for me at the moment.

Athalos has been kind enough to follow me along on my madness with the guitar, and he's been getting back to speed on playing as well. I'm hoping we'll both keep at it this time around.

April 18

Running on Lazy again. Didn't get any workout in at all. Whatever illness I've caught, it's affecting me in the upper back and neck. It sucks.

Today marks the start of my push for fitness. I intend to take the time from now until the end of the month (13 days) to get my body ready for the harsh treatment I will inflict on it in the coming months. The plan is to push myself pretty hard in May, June and July, looking to go from my starting weight of 200.8 down to 178.8 or lower. Yeah, 30 pounds in 3 months. Aggressive goal, I know. But I want it.

Today was a wash, tomorrow will be better.

Weight: 198.6#

April 17

I'm not feeling 100%, but I'm well enough that I can do something. I've lost so much that the only thing I can do is start back at the beginning again.

I kept this first workout simple enough. 5 execises, done in 3 sets each. Focusing on arms and shoulders.

3x5 push ups
3x5 25# kettlebell shoulder press
3x5 chair dips
3x10 25# bent-over row
3x5 25# overhead tricep press

Overall, this felt very light. And it is. But, I've got a couple things I have to overcome - so I'm starting slow.

Weight: 200.6#

Apr 16

Due to the bloodwork, and just being lazy, I didn't do anything fitness related today.

Weight: 199.8#

I think today's going to be a loss as far as any real fitness activity is concerned. Got some bloodwork done today, and they suggest you not work the arm too much after that. Might ignore that and just do some anyway. I'm not really worried about bruising or whatever.

Also had my nerve conduction tested. Came out ok, though some possible concerns with my elbows - which isn't that surprising to me.

I need to work up a plan of stuff I can do for fitness. I'll put some effort that way today.

Apr 15

I've got a medical thing tomorrow - which requires 12 hours of fasting. No food in the morning might be a reasonable change up.

But, since I don't want to really throw off my sugars, etc. No workout tonight. I'll be on it all tomorrow.

Weight: 200.8#

April 14

Posted the first blog post today. Tried to keep an eye on food today, but someone in the office dropped off a lot of chocolate - a serious weakness of mine.

Athalos came over by bike, and we went to the park with his new competition weight Frisbee/flying disc. Took a bit to get used to the heavier weight, but after a little bit, we had it worked out.

No real workout today, just some play.

Today's weight: 198.4#